Where Best to Meet/Approach Prospective Dates

Below is a list of domains that offer opportunities to meet/approach individuals whom one may fancy as prospective dates, ordered in terms of: ‘relatively daunting' (least to most) + ‘social acceptability' (most to least). Visitors might also like to consider the hobbies/activities list that I often use with clients (excel)

1) Through friends/family/existing social networks and events
2) Through workplace/place of education/volunteering
3) Through social/activity groups/clubs
4) At concerts/exhibitions and other cultural events
5) Online non-dating websites e.g. social networking, meetup sites, forums etc
6) Out and about e.g. daygame (men have an advantage) and night game (women have an advantage)
7) Online dating (women have an advantage)
8) Speed dating

1,2,3) May mean the opportunity to get to know the person on a certain level before things take on a romantic element, and perhaps seamless social integration for yourself and your new date but, equally, may also mean that the prospect is potentially too safe/familiar from the get-go, threaten to complicate life within the group/environment, and particularly if things go South in the relationship

4,5) Provide a nice low-key/casual, natural, and relatively non-intrusive basis for an approach/sparking conversation and friendship with a stranger. However, one potential downside - where males are concerned, is that it could easily result in ‘friendly’ behaviour and ‘nice guy’ internal labelling (potentially leading to the dreaded friendzone)

Where females are concerned – one may expose a guy to aspects of your personality that may weigh more heavily on his mind/cause him to question your association whilst he is not experiencing you in the round

6) Daygame requires a lot of bottle, particularly in a relatively interpersonally closed/guarded social environment such as some of the towns and cities of the UK, but can be a perfectly pleasant, novel experience for all concerned if one establishes and holds good eye contact, speaks clearly and, crucially, remembers to catch ones breath and to smile - ideally including ‘SMIZE' (‘smiling with your eyes’)!

Night game is standard fare for those who ‘go out on the pull' and unfortunately there are a whole host of reasons why this is rarely the best domain through which to meet prospective dates - particularly if a strong and sustainable relationship is desired; these include drink/drug use vs. guards being up, competition, difficulty communicating and particular social behaviours in related contexts

7) Although this medium can be a somewhat useful ‘stepping stone’ tool for building essential conversational/social skills and awareness in those who need this, from a male perspective, the effort-to-reward ratio is typically pretty dire, especially if you’re:

• Young/young looking
• Not conventionally attractive
• Not patently wealthy/lacking GSOH and/or a nice ride

From a female perspective, this is a strong option, so long as one is sensible/stays reasonably safe – particularly for those females who are:

• Looking for casual/short-term liaisons or else skilled/experienced at filtering/rooting out males who are not long term prospects
• Blessed with attractive aesthetics (facial looks, bodies, heights)
• Living in large urban centres (lots to chose from)
• Between the ages of 18-30

8) Apart from anything else this can be great fun, is a level playing field, person, and personality, centred, and involves what is for many a good balance between immersive social activity vs. not too full on or intense one-to-one focus, contact, and communication

A major draw back, as with online dating, from a male perspective is that it is lacking a clear-cut, socially acceptable opportunity for a man to differentiate himself from other males e.g. on the basis of confidence, compared with contexts in which an attractive female does not necessarily expect to be approached/hit on

Link: Places to Meet Women

Link: Places to Meet Men